Flagg's House Party
by Threebranch
Summary: Chapter 3: 5/12/2020. After watching a cringey video online, Flagg ends up agreeing to an idea by yours truly. We will get through the Covid-19 crisis together, friends. 'Unwritten' is a song by Natasha Bedingfield. I don't own it.
1. Chapter 1

_Author's Note: _I only messaged Flagg about this story. I didn't want to take the time and message the six others.

This story wasn't even planned two days ago. It popped up in my head.

It's another Hahadavis parody and I had to look into a few chapters of another guy's fanfiction just for inspiration purposes. I'll give you guys a hint, he was a part of the Sonic fandom before he quit writing.

Anyway, I hope you guys enjoy.

* * *

**Flagg's House Party**

"_She say she too young don't want no man._

_So she gon call her friends now that's a plan._

_I just ordered sushi from Japan._

_Now your bitch wanna kick it,_

_JACKIE CHAN!"_

Threebranch opened up a Pandora account just for this special occasion.

Today is Flagg1991's birthday. The fanfiction writers are at his house celebrating.

In one way or another, they have all been inspired to write fanfiction because of him.

Also at the party is AberrantScript, who is dancing along with Flagg and Threebranch to the music.

The Bodacious E, Salvo1985, and LoudRisque are seen socializing and having a drink together.

Captain Dodge and Zoryan El Muerto are having pizza together and discussing new story ideas.

Flagg himself, however, is feeling differently than everyone else who is just partying in his living room.

He thinks to himself.

"_Damn. Another year older, and I'm STILL broke!_

_I don't even know why I'm even dancing with these two idiots, this is a stupid party!_

_Fuck this birthday! I ain't nothing but another year closer till the day I leave this Earth! Threebranch should have NEVER thrown this party! What was he thinking!?_

_I FUCKING HATE THIS SONG! WHY IS HE NOT SKIPPING IT!?_

_That sushi from Japan's gotta be stale by the time it's delivered and he KNOWS Jackie Chan is Chinese! There's no way he could have thought he was from Japan when he first heard that!_

_And here I am throwing my hands up in the air like I just don't care. I DO CARE!_

_Guys, if you're gonna dance at __**MY **__party, at least dance like normal! I'm tired of seeing that Fortnite shit!"_

Threebranch stopped dancing for a bit to pat Flagg on the back.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY MAN! HERE'S TO ANOTHER YEAR!"

Flagg thinks to himself again.

"_I don't know why he's telling me Happy Birthday. There isn't anything to be happy about. If he touches me again, I'll make SURE he won't see another birthday!_

_Shit, isn't his birthday in JUNE or something? Whatever. He's got a shit taste in music anyway! If he ever invites me to a party of his, I'll just tell him that I'm busy and can't go!"_

Flagg then pops the cork off a bottle of really cheap champagne, spilling half of its contents on the floor.

The music then changes to **You make me feel **by Cobra Starship.

"_Girl I've been all over the world. Looking for you. _

_I'm known for taking what I think I deserve._

_And you're overdue."_

Taking in the new music, he thinks again.

"_Okay. OKAY! Maybe his taste in music isn't as shit as I thought!_

_Damn. Do I really need to drink JUST because it's my birthday!?_

_I should be in the circus. I look like a MOTHERFUCKING CLOWN!_

**(SINGING)**

_**Everything you know, I'm flipping upside down!**_

_**Take you 'round the world. **_

_**You know I like it LOUD!**_

_**Tell me what you want cause we can do just what you like!**_

_Damn, how OLD am I!? I'm willing to bet my FUCKING KEYBOARD that everybody else in this house doesn't know either! I definitely didn't tell them my age._

_None of them even called ahead so they could purchase number candles to put on a cake or anything like that. I wouldn't have minded calculating my age using my drivers licence. _

_Hell, none of them even called me AT ALL! They all just showed up at my house unannounced!_

_I was just about to call the fucking cops when I noticed all those cars in my driveway, FUCK!_

_I was just about to watch 'Escape Room,' too. It's a one day rental and I got to work all day tomorrow. When I go to return the movie and the clerk over at the store says, 'How was the movie?' I'll say, 'I don't know, seven guys and a work day stopped me from watching it!'_

_This isn't even a party, it's a broke get together. All those bottles they brought me, I'm gonna take them back to the store and get the money back."_

He then takes a drink, trying to drown his sorrows.

"_Okay, this is really starting to get out of hand. Salvo is over there smoking a knife as if he thinks it makes him look cool and Abby is wearing __**MY **__lampshade on his head while dancing like Silent Fucking Bob!_

_WHO DOES HE THINK HE IS!? SQUIDWARD!?"_

Flagg then walks over to Threebranch's laptop and shuts it, stopping the music.

"ALRIGHT! EVERYBODY GET OUT!"

"What? Why, Flagg? The party's just started!" Said AberrantScript

"WE'RE IN A **P.W.N.G! **GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!"

"Okay, someone tell me, what does P.W.N.G. even stand for?" Said Zoryan

"**A PARTY WITH NO GIRLS!" **Shouted Flagg.

Suddenly, a Lincoln Loud in his mid 20's teleported to Flagg's living room.

"KRONOS!" Shouted Threebranch.

"FINALLY! I'M IN THE REAL WORLD!" Shouted Lincoln 'Kronos' Loud. A creation of Threebranch and the main protagonist in 'Things are Happening!'

During his state of bliss, however, Lincoln was then slapped in the face by Flagg.

"THE FUCK YOU ARE! YOU CAN GET THE FUCK OUT TOO!"

Unknown to Flagg, however, the moment his hand made contact with Lincoln's face, all his stories: The 'Cest Kids, Night of the Bimbo Sisters and its sequel, A House Divided, Pedophile… ALL OF THEM! We're magically implanted in Lincoln's mind in the timespan of that one second.

He fell to the floor. The scream he gave out… was deafening. One might even say Loud.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

"GOD! MY EARS!"

Every fanfiction writer in that party covered their ears but it did almost nothing.

"Threebranch! Threebranch! Threebranch!" Lincoln is yelling for his author like he's about to die and is begging for his life.

"What? What do you want me to do?"

"Control your friend! He's crazy!"

Threebranch snapped back at his own creation.

"BITCH! None of this would have happened if you just stayed in your side of the story instead of crossing over to mine! Now you know the TRUE power of fanfiction writers! GET THE FUCK OUT!"

"Threebranch… I… I'm sorry."

"GET THE FUCK OUT AND RUN TO YOUR DADDY! RUN TO YOUR DADDY, KRONOS! WE DON'T NEED YOU HERE!"

Regretting his actions, Lincoln teleports away from Flagg's living room. And his life.

"Sorry you had to see all that, Flagg. He'll get over those stories of yours."

He turns his attention to the other writers.

"Okay everyone, party's over. Let's get out of Flagg's house and work on some more stories."

Nodding in agreement the six guys follow Threebranch out of the house while Flagg just stood there staring at his hand. Taking in the fact that he has a superpower he can use against fictional characters.

He then realizes something.

"Damn! I should have forced them to clean up all this mess first!"


	2. Chapter 2

**Well guys, since the last chapter did so well, I have decided to write a follow up to celebrate the Fourth of July. I know it's a couple days late but there's a reason for that. I've taken a short break from writing my Sin Kids story 'Chlorine' to focus on this one right here. This just deserves only a chapter and not a story of it's own, I think.**

**Again, I wasn't planning on even writing this even a week ago. It's something I came up with over the course of about six hours.**

**I'll be honest here. If Hahadavis didn't post that hilarious video on the Fourth of July, this wouldn't have happened.**

**Anyway, I hope you guys like this follow up I came up with. I'm dedicated to making the best stories I can come up with for you all and I look forward to listening to anything that you think I need to hear.**

* * *

**Flagg1991's Independence Day Special**

"_I am apt to believe that it will be celebrated by succeeding generations as the great anniversary festival. It ought to be commemorated as the day of deliverance, by solemn acts of God Almighty. It ought to be solemnized with pomp and parade, with shows, sports, guns, bells, bonfires, and illuminations from one end of this continent to the other, from all this time forward forever more."_

_**-John Adams, 1776**_

It's been nearly two months since the events of that fun house party.

Things for Flagg1991 have only been quieter and more peaceful since then. He sees it as nothing that he can complain about.

Most people who write for entertaining purposes often follow a nocturnal lifestyle. They often get their best ideas in the dark, quiet nights with the occasional chirping of the grasshoppers outside.

This is not the case for Flagg. He's normally in bed by midnight.

He decided to do this for himself to try to avoid waking up a noon like he usually does back in his first year of writing Loud House fanfictions.

Not one thing is making a sound in his house. All the lights are off, the temperature is perfect, and his desktop computer completed with his own personally modified wireless keyboard, sit completely still and untouched. Only until he decides to write.

We see our hero, Flagg, as he lies down on his bed with his eyes closed.

A short and slow pattern of breathing through his nose can be heard as his hands are at his sides.

At a distance, one would say that he's sleeping…

But he's not.

***BANG* *BANG* *BANG* *BANG* *BANG* *BANG* *BANG* *BANG* *BANG* **

While Flagg's house IS quiet, the same just can't be said for the rest for the rest of the neighborhood.

Right outside his four walls, there are fanfiction writers socializing with his neighbors and shooting off fireworks off in the air for the Fourth of July celebration and now it's too loud for Flagg, who is just trying to get some sleep.

He starts to think to himself.

"_DAMN FIREWORKS! DON'T THOSE FUCKERS OUTSIDE HAVE JOBS!?"_

He's a loud thinker.

**(Shake It - Metro Station)**

"_**I'll take you home if you don't leave me at the front door…**_

_**Your body's cold but girl we're getting so warm."**_

"_SERIOUSLY!? I DON'T WANNA SHAKE!"_

His thoughts were interrupted again when he heard someone outside scream into a megaphone.

"WOOOOOOO! IT'S FOURTH OF JULY! WE'RE LETTING THESE FIREWORKS OFF UNTIL WE DIE!"

Flagg recognizes that voice.

It was the voice of ShootingStarBlitz.

He is the author of 'Too Little Too Late,' a story that Flagg has personally favorited on the site.

Flagg reminds himself that Blitz had only moved to his neighborhood recently due to a job transfer. That was about a month after the events of that wretched party. Blitz being one of the few writers who couldn't make it.

One more thing about Blitz. He doesn't go out and BUY fireworks… he makes his own.

"_BLITZ! You've done nothing but shoot off your homemade noise makers in the air for THREE NIGHTS IN A ROW! IT'S JULY __**SEVENTH! **__I thought you were just kidding when you said you handcrafted 50,000 fireworks in your garage!_

_Isn't that illegal!? Where are the police at!?"_

Flagg groans as he pulls up his sheets to cover his head. He's done this about ten times so far this night but he likes to think that it would turn the noise down. It helped him doze off the last two nights.

It didn't work for him this time however, when he heard another familiar voice scream into the megaphone outside.

"IT'S 6 A.M. BUT WE'RE JUST GETTING STARTED! CRATE AFTER CRATE AFTER CRATE IT'S GREAT!"

He pulls the covers off his head. 6 A.M.?

He checks his cell phone for the time.

6:01.

"God damn you, Captain Dodge."

Out there with Blitz is Captain Dodge, the fanfiction writer who used to be a pirate and has 14 children.

He is the author of classic works like I Love Lincoln, Sin Kid Showdown, and A Special Bond.

Before this Fourth of July celebration, he temporarily put his pirate captain hat back on and ended up pillaging a whole truck packed with smuggled m-80s. He's now shooting them along with Blitz's homemade illegal fireworks.

Dodge screams into the megaphone again.

"LET'S TAKE IT TO THE OLD SCHOOL NOW!"

"_Old school?"_

Dodge changes the music.

**(Firework - Katy Perry)**

"**Do you ever feel…**

**Like a plastic bag?**

**Drifting through the wind…**

**Wanting to start again."**

"_Katy Perry, Dodge? Really? I mean… it's not all that surprising coming from YOU!"_

***KA-BOOM***

Flagg had to cover his ears for that one.

"_Okayyyyyy. I haven't looked outside my window but I'm __**pretty sure **__my next door neighbor's house just fucking exploded._

_Oh my God! What if MY house is next!?"_

What Flagg heard next however, is more unexpected than the sound of his neighbor's house blowing up.

The sound of cheering and applause. All his neighbors having the time of their lives. Including the one whose house was just blown up.

"_Well… at least it's over now. I got work at 10 so I can get at least three hours of sleep before I…"_

His thoughts were interrupted again by the sound of someone else… another writer… who screams into the megaphone outside.

This writer, while he may not be the most irritating person Flagg has dealt with on the fanfiction website, he easily makes the top three.

"YOU GUYS THOUGHT WE WERE FINISHED!? HEAVENS NO! NOW IT'S TIME FOR THE FOUR HOUR GRAND FINALE!"

_**Threebranch.**_

Author of the 'Threebranch Fanfiction Multiverse' as well as the ongoing Sin Kids fanfic, 'Chlorine.'

He was the one who organized this whole event in the first place. It's his way of saying 'Thank You' to the writers who allowed him to use their characters in his own stories.

But Flagg doesn't care about all that. He just did a little math…

"_**THAT DOES IT!"**_

He reaches into the drawer of his nightstand and pulls out his 9 millimeter pistol.

"The Loud House fandom is about to have 3 less writers in it!"

He changes into his signature attire: tight fitting jeans, a leather jacket, and his iconic big Aviator sunglasses.

Loaded pistol in hand, he makes his way to the front door of his house, he softly sings to himself.

"**All the other kids with the pumped up kicks. **

**You'd better run, better run, outrun my gun.**

**All the other kids with the pumped up kicks.**

**You'd better run, better run, faster than my bullet."**

He opens the door expecting to see a sea of faces suddenly look his way only to be blinded by a colossal flashing light.

"AAAAAH!" He yelled.

His sunglasses didn't do anything to help him.

* * *

"Seriously Threebranch? I know this is YOUR story and all but did you really have to stick me in the goddamn Matrix!?"

Flagg is standing in absolute nothingness thinking that it's the Matrix.

I switch the gears to first person POV and address him directly.

"Flagg, I put you in here for a reason. A creative reason. And this isn't the Matrix. I haven't seen it."

Almost immediately, Flagg caught on to my plan.

"Ah, I see. You're trying to reference the last episode of 'Clerks: The Animated Series.' You know, you really need to stop with the Clerks references. It stopped being funny in the third chapter of your story… What was it called again?"

Flagg thinks to himself before remembering the title of my work.

"Oh yes! 'Lincoln's Gonna Get Beaten Tonight!' A more accurate title would be 'Lincoln ISN'T Gonna Get Beaten Tonight!' All your characters do in that story is just talk! Nothing else."

I argue back at him.

"Hey! Not only am I not gonna stop with the Clerks references. I'm gonna include a LOT more in my upcoming story… 'Things are Happening 2!'"

Flagg laughs at my title.

"Things are Happening 2? I could barely read the FIRST one! You want me to remind you of how it started again?

The prologue was nothing more than a guy saying how much he loves God… BORING!

It's followed by the first chapter, which is just a 1000 word essay on how much Lincoln… THE SAME ONE I THAT I SLAPPED THE SHIT OUT OF I REMIND YOU… loves Detroit.

I swear, if Detroit had a dick, your Lincoln would get down on his knees and suck it every night.

And don't get me STARTED on how bad the REST of your characters are!"

Fair points, Flagg. Fair points.

"I… was new to the fanfiction writing process… I had to start somewhere… I needed to … fail faster."

Flagg shakes his head and sighs, having a little bit of pity on me: a random guy that came out of nowhere on August 31st, 2018 on the Loud House mature crossover page.

It hasn't even been one year since I officially decided to write fanfictions to avoid boredom.

"That is one of the best pieces of writing advice that's out there… Fail faster. Learn from past mistakes. Take the bad with the good.

You publish something, Threebranch, it doesn't matter how good you think it is or how much time you've spent with it. Someone, somewhere is gonna hate it. The same thing happens for every single one of us here on this site."

We stay silent for a while on the blank canvas until I speak up again.

"How about I… SHOW you how much I've improved."

* * *

Flagg had to take off his sunglasses to take in what he's seeing.

1216 Franklin Avenue: The Loud House. Standing in front of him in all its flawed glory.

"Royal Woods… No… Not MY Royal Woods… and definitely not Captain Dodge's. Threebranch's Royal Woods."

He then hears the sound of music playing in the garage. Moving to the side so that he can't be seen, he listens in.

"'**We don't deal with outsiders very well.'**

**They say newcomers have a certain smell.**

**You have trust issues not to mention.**

**They say they can smell your intentions."**

Flagg then decides to softly sing along.

"_**You'll never know the freakshow sitting next to you.**_

_**You'll have some weird people sitting next to you.**_

_**You'll think 'How'd I get here, sitting next to you?'**_

_**But after all I said…**_

_**Please don't forget."**_

He gasps.

"_**Gloom Eclipse. **_I was singing along with Lyle. He was insulting his sisters with those lyrics."

He scratches his head. He knows he's free to leave this place and go back home to his job whenever he feels like, but he decides that he doesn't want to. Not yet.

Wanting to check out Royal Woods for himself, he stands up and puts his hands in his pockets.

Walking away from the house with the sins that can't be washed away with all the rain in Oklahoma, he talks to himself to say the final three lines to end this chapter.

"Threebranch wrote that there's a talent show coming up later in the story.

I GOT to see that shit.

Maybe I'll stand near the exit or something."


	3. Chapter 3

**I would like to take a moment to thank all the writers that gave me permission to include their names in the story. I really appreciate it. There also won't be another chapter of this story until May 12th, 2021, and that's if I'm still writing fanfic.**

**We will never forget the impact of the Covid-19 global pandemic and how it has changed all our lives. We're all in this together and we'll get through this together. Stay safe, friends.**

**It's going to be alright.**

* * *

**(MARCH 24, 2020)**

"**...And the world will live as one."**

Things haven't been good for Flagg1991.

The same can be said for millions of people worldwide due to the impact of the global pandemic, but knowing that only does very little to make him feel better.

He started the day off like he does every morning: feeling empty, lost, and depressed.

He's been depressed several times before in his life, but this wave has got to be the worst of them all.

In a common effort to distract himself from his pain, he made the decision to browse around online for a little while. Just to see what's going on in the rest of the world.

The video he stumbled across however, gave him the exact opposite of what he hoped for.

Twenty-five celebrities, most of which he doesn't even know, have decided to post a video online where they each sing a small part of John Lennon's 'Imagine.'

Now, it should be known that Flagg doesn't hate or even dislike the song itself. Although, he can understand why there are people that do.

Like this great singer who spoke out against the P.M.R.C. in a senate hearing way back when: _"Songs allow a person to put their own imagination, experiences, and dreams, into the lyrics. People can interpret it in many ways."_

So Flagg has no problem with the song itself. His problem is with the people singing it.

"This has to be… the most cringey shit… that I've ever seen… in my entire fucking life! Why do I feel like I'm being MOCKED right now!?"

Regretting his decision to look at online videos, he turns off his cell phone and slams it on his desk; feeling more angry than he was five minutes before.

After what he put himself through, he needed a cigarette.

* * *

**(LATER THAT NIGHT)**

"_So… I was thinking… maybe we should do something similar?"_

After having calmed down a bit, Flagg is sitting in front of his computer facetiming Threebranch; who says he has an idea.

This idea, of course, is for six Loud House fanfiction writers to do something similar to the 'Imagine' video that garnered dislikes from tens of thousands of people.

Flagg takes a moment to evaluate the idea. It doesn't really seem all that bad once you think about it. Unlike Hollywood actors, people who write fanfiction aren't exactly wealthy.

They have lives outside of writing. They have jobs, both part and full time, they have school or college to attend. Some of them have both those things to worry about.

They may be your neighbors, your co-workers, your friends, or even your family. They go to the grocery store, they get gas, they face the same traffic everyone else does.

They exhaust themselves trying to appease everyone they can at work only for them to go home and do the same thing in their free time. They develop their own personal writing talents chapter by chapter.

Paragraph by paragraph.

Talent is not a requirement to be famous. The evidence of this is the many people out in the world that are talented, but don't receive the attention that they deserve.

After taking a moment to drink some coffee, Flagg nods at Threebranch's idea.

"Alright, Threebranch. We'll go with your idea. And I have just the song that's perfect for all of us!"

* * *

**(MAY 12, 2020) **

Sitting at the same seat at home, Flagg starts off the song while looking at his video camera.

"**I am unwritten. Can't read my mind. I'm undefined."**

* * *

Threebranch picks up where Flagg left off. He decided that bringing his laptop outside was a good idea.

It does look like it's going to rain.

"**I'm just beginning! The pen's in my hand! Ending unplanned!"**

* * *

Zoryan El Muerto picks up where Threebranch left off.

Behind him is a window that he opened to point at as he sings his part.

"**Staring at the blank page before you!**

**Open up the dirty window!**

**Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find!"**

* * *

Whimfu1 picks up where Zoryan left off.

Unlike with Threebranch, it's nice outside where he's at. Behind him is an apiary with a lot of honey bees swarming around it.

He's keeping a safe distance.

"**Reaching… for something in the distance.**

**So close you can almost taste it.**

**Release your inhibitions."**

* * *

Captain Dodge picks up where Whimfu1 left off.

Unlike everybody else, he's in his garage. He's been staying inside a lot more than usual with everything that's been going on.

"**Feel the rain on your skin!**

**No one else can feel it for you!**

**Only you can let it in!**

**No one else! No one else!**

**Can speak the words on your lips!"**

* * *

Finally, RedHerald sings where Captain Dodge left off.

He's standing on a rooftop of a building somewhere overlooking the city street below.

"**Drench yourself in words unspoken. **

**Live your life with arms wide open.**

**Today is, where your book begins…"**

* * *

Flagg starts to sing again. "**The rest is… **OKAY this is stupid!" He's getting angry again.

_"Come on man!" _Threebranch starts to argue. _"You lost the vote! You have to sing!" _

This only made him angrier. "I still can't believe nobody else voted for 'Paperback Writer!' What? You all don't WANT to sing something from The Beatles!?"

Zoryan raises his right hand. _"Can I say something? I never heard of EITHER of these songs until today and Unwritten just sounded more appealing."_

Whimfu1 crosses his arms. _"I have to agree with Zoryan. It's not the 1960's! At least we picked a song from this century."_

Flagg shakes his head. "This century has been nothing but a disappointment to me. And this was a stupid idea anyway!" He shuts off his webcam before having to hear Captain Dodge and RedHerald argue back at him.

"I can't believe them! I can't believe them!"

He then turns his head to the left to see a tabletop 8x10 framed picture of the late Kenny Rogers looking modest.

"Can you believe them!?" He shouts at the picture. "I can't"

After what he put himself through, he needed another cigarette.


End file.
